2 Funerals in 30 Days

I'd like to start by thanking all of you for being present to honor our Grandmother, our mother, our cousin, our aunt, our friend and although she was an only child, our sister of all sisters. And also, for being present to honor an awareness of the emotions and the memories that we've all been experiencing around the passing of Margaret Villeneuve.

At my Grandmothers 65th Birthday Party, my mother made a speech that made a reference (albeit a comical and not so positive reference) to her punctuality or lack of it. She was presented with a beautiful chime clock to assist her in being more punctual. I would like to offer that this time, and to this destination she's arrived on time.

I suppose that with so many questions and curiosities around death, we may suggest that a timely arrival be defined unequivocally by the preciousness of a very full, very long and very benevolent life. To experience Margaret's very full and very long life, we need only close our eyes and place her image before us to feel the vibration and the colour of her entire being.

Last week, my cousin Paula painted my Gramma's fingernails. Pink; the colour of a young girl's heart.

As she did so, I had an image in my mind of my Grandmother at the age of 84, just before she died. I saw her on a beautiful wooden park bench; her face toward the buttery sun; the red and gold leaves chattering in fall fashion all around her.

I place next to her my Grandmother at the age of 10. They lean into one another and they hold each other's soft hands. They are matched in their beliefs and their thoughts about life. The 10-year-old Gramma is sorry to hear about what she's endured over the next 74 years but she's not surprised.

I like to lengthen the bench and add a Gramma between them for each decade of her life. Now the bench is filled; a 10 year old Margaret, a 20 year old Margaret, a 30 year old Margaret, a 40 year old Margaret, a 50 year old Margaret and a 60, 70, and 84 year old Margaret.

When I do, the park bench begins to reflect her strength in character; it shows a progression, that she's always moved forward. My Gramma's very full and very long life was also content. As each of the Gramma's chat with each other on the bench, they discover their pains and their lessons; they listen and they smile and they know one another. The youngest Margaret must have known that she was meant for a life of perseverance; the oldest Margaret had come out victorious because of that perseverance.

My own memories of my Grandmother are very bright. You know they say that the reason that Grandparents and Grandchildren get along so well is because they have a common enemy! She never said a harsh word to me; she never used my first name in combination with my middle and last name in anger. When I think of her now I can smell her and I can see her behind the steering wheel of many a car. I see bubbles blowing from her mauve lips. I hear her voice, scratching at the silence and carving out a shape.

Our relationship was never still for we traveled the highways each weekend to visit the friends and family she loved so dearly. Sometimes I think that if it weren't for her bum leg, the two of us would have traveled in an Indian Motorcycle; me in the sidecar of course!

Margaret Villeneuve was a lighthouse. And all of us here who are related to her either by blood or by love are lighthouses too. We are lighthouses for we are grounded, we are in position, we help others to find their way and we embody light. While my Gramma has come through many storms, she always kept her lighthouse windows clean. Her clean windows meant that she never complained; she was always illuminated in our presence; when we glided into her territory she would keep us safe for the night and she helped us to project our own light.

It may be true that we have all just come through a storm of emotion and memory around Margaret's passing. To honour her and to be certain that she may find each one of us and feel the power of our light, let us clean our windows as the day and our lives go on so that we may begin to shine again.

We love you Gramma. Please kiss your husband and your son for us.